Stroke The Ego

Howdy Ya'all

I'm not going to even pretend that anyone is going to read this, rather I think I'm just going to use this as a journal of sorts. To anyone who stumbles on this, a warning: One of my flaws is that when I'm writing I just WRITE.... That is I don't think about it...... My little internal censor takes a holiday and I express myself without thinking of how I sound or if I'm coming off as a nutter.

*Shrugs*

So then.... I've been in a very foul mood recently. I just got back from checking out Wheaton ( a school in Illinois) which I want to get into very badly. I don't think I quite cut the mustard though. I'm very insecure when it comes to my future (not to mention my relationships with other people, I can't tell you the last normal friendship I've had, I have an uncanny knack to make things "weird"). I like "sure" things, things that aren't in doubt. I need things to be defined and clear so I know how to act, and I'm about to start a process that will require a fair amount of emotional involvement. I'm very afraid. It's also very hot here where I live so that isn't helping my mood any. I need to get out of my hometown, I feel/think that I'm stagnating.

On the upside my writings have taking a fruitious turn.... I'm starting to tackle some source material on museum collection protocols and museum curatorial work that I hope will give me enough of a boost to start my LB in earnest.